The Bardos

Two days ago I took some psilocybin and enjoyed a rather intensely pleasurable experience. I had prepared by reading The Psychedelic Experience (a manual based on the Tibetan Book of the Dead) several weeks prior. Allowing this time to adjust and ingest the information contained in the book really set the experience off right when I was finally ready. My son was back home visiting his mother which left the home open for use. The Tibetan model that surrounds the corruption of the faculties at the time of death or ego loss, remains with heavy influence upon me. This is a recent article that proved enriching: The Bardos that I had read about corresponded quite well with the entire session. I was able to recognize the various hallucinations and refer to them with the manual. Overall, my desire to control the experience was to a much more significant degree suspended. The familiarity with scenes and mental processes provided the comfort necessary to retreat into further exploration. The disposition and overall mood was confident and reassuring. Flowing in and out of alternating modes of perceptual distortion, I felt at ease and able to reflect on the nature of mental oscillations. I began listening to the Heart Sutra and picking up on the internal rhythms that fell into synch from time to time with the waves of effect. An hour in I was perceiving what I considered to be the processes of my autonomic nervous system. Specifically entertaining was the heart rate and breathing rhythm. It became the center of preoccupation for some time. What little anxiety remained was countered by pacing out my breaths and walking. I performed my Liber Resh at dusk and had some particularly exaggerated effects that were great. I performed the adoration facing the western horizon and shut my eyes. I coordinated the breath and concentrated on the visualization of being "within the barque". Brilliant glowing lights filled the closed field of vision and brightened vibrantly as I spoke. At one particular moment I recollect trying to decode a language internally and thinking "this is molecular information". Internally guiding your system away from the ego is a challenge. The desire to control is overwhelming and often pulls like an angry child. I felt some progress with this trip and came away with something.-pronounced dead on arrival-. It was spiritual for me and the correlations between the Bardos and this journey were tandem thus delivering me at ego loss and conjuring an approach to what lies within the Godhead.